The things that keep me up at night

September 12, 2011

It's 5:30 am but I have been awake since 3:30. I'm not quite sure what woke me up (this time it was not Paige) but I know what is keeping me up. I have a decision to make and it is weighing heavily on my mind. It is not a tough decision, but Eric and I are on opposite sides of the fence and so it is harder that it should be. It involves preschool. Not really a life altering decision you might think, but it could be for Cameron. I don't want to mess the poor kid up for life. I want to provide him with adequate mental stimulation, but don't want to overstimulate him. I want him to achieve his full potential without burning him out.

We currently have Cameron enrolled in preschool at the Child Development Centre(CDC) two afternoons a week. It is a great preschool with an excellent reputation, and I was happy with our decision to enroll him there. Cameron is exited because his friends Rylen and Mila are going to be in his class, and the centre has a small pool which they let the kids use once a month. Cameron can sometimes get very anxious when I leave him and since the centre deals with children with developmental delays, I thought they would easily be able to deal with Cameron if he gets upset at being left there. They also have an open door policy and you can stay as long as you like or watch from behind a one way mirror so that you know your child is OK before you leave. Despite it being a great preschool, it was not actually my first choice.

My first choice for preschool was the Montessori preschool that opened here in the spring. I signed Cameron up for the six week spring/summer session as a bit of a trial to see how he would do in a preschool setting. The class was only 5 students and very mellow, and the kids used real life tools instead of toys. It went better than I could have ever expected. My clingy child who usually cried whenever I left him anywhere, and whose only nightmares were about me leaving him behind, ran off into the preschool with barely a glance back at me. He LOVED it and looked forward to going every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon. I was excited we had finally found something he could enjoy without me there beside him and he was always excited to show me his artwork or tell me what he had learned that day. It was a perfect fit for him........but sadly I registered him too late and the next session was full. I would have to fall back on choice #2.

The CDC was great but the class was going to be 20 kids and there were fantastic toys everywhere. He was going to have a lot of fun but I wasn't sure how much he would actually learn. It was OK though as the main reason we wanted him in preschool was to get him used to being away from me for some of the day in preparation for next year when he starts kindergarten. Cameron and I both need a little prep work.

So I signed Cameron up for the CDC but I was still thinking about the Montessori class and how great it would be if she opened up another day and had room for Cameron. We went to our CDC registration and orientation and Cameron got really excited to start. And then it happened, I heard that the Montessori school had opened up another time and had space on Wednesday mornings. I could keep Cameron in the Tuesday and Thursday afternoons at the CDC and ALSO put him in Wed morning at the CDC. We could have the best of both worlds. Registration was in 2 days and so I emailed the teacher and told her we would take a spot. I was so excited. ....until I talked to Eric that is.

I excitedly told Eric of the opportunity to put Cameron back in the Montessori school that he loved it so much, and how Cameron was excited at the thought of going back to Miss Melanie's class and still being able to go the new school with the pool. I thought it was perfect. Eric replied with "It's too much, you're over scheduling him, let him be a kid". My heart sank.....What? Really? It's only a few hours a few days a week. Next year he is going to be in kindergarten full days 5 days a week, this will be good for him so that next year is not such a shock. Cameron is exited to do both, he wants to do both, why can't we do both? "Do what you like but I think it's too much" was his reply.

Oh no, now what? I would really like to put him in both, and Eric wants to keep him in just one. I sadly e-mailed the teacher and told that we had reconsidered and would not be able to attend. I could not stop thinking about it though, especially since Cameron excitedly chatted about his two new schools and asked when he was going back to Miss Melanie's. I had to break the news to him that he was not going back. He was disappointed, so was I. I knew how much he enjoyed it and I really wanted it for him.

Still not a big deal you might think, it's just preschool, so what. Cameron though is a very bright child. He needs a lot of mental stimulation and it's hard for me to provide it for him with my attention divided between him and his sister. Every morning he asks to go to preschool, or strong start, or gymnastics. He likes to be busy. I think he can handle it. I have a friend who has her daughter in both as well. She will be at the CDC two days a week and at the Montessori school two days a week. Surely Cameron can handle 3 days......I need to sleep on this, if only I could sleep!


September 23, 2011

So what ever happened with the preschool dilemma? Well we had to make a decision quick as the class was going to fill up fast, and so I had a long chat with Eric. His biggest concern wasn't that I was going to burn Cameron out (we aren' doing THAT much) but that with all the excitement going on Cameron would never learn to entertain himself. Cameron is already able to entertain himself and an extra 3 hours a week of preschool isn't going to change that, and so I went to the open house to talk to the teacher and make our final decision. As soon as we walked in the door Cameron was soooo excited I knew he had made the decision for me. I handed over my cheque and talked to her about what they would be doing that year. She was really happy to have Cameron back in her class and he was so happy I knew we had made the right choice. It is going to be a bit pricey having him him two preschools, but I really do think it it going to be good for him.

Sadly this means I have to put my own fun on hold. I was going to join roller derby, but I think it is just too much for me to get to the practices after chauffeuring Cameron around and it is a lot of money too. I will practice my skating and maybe down the road when we are a little more into the groove I will try again.